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Sometimes I find my mind to be busy. What do I mean by this? I mean thoughts that are just going around in my head, one thought leading to another, sometimes in a negative spiral. Sometimes it can feel uncontrollable, almost as if the thoughts are taking over me and I cannot control where it takes me. All these invisible streams of words can just be going around in my mind – they cannot be seen but can be heard and felt internally.
In these moments, I tend to feel the strong and powerful emotions, riding it like a wave. It is almost as if it is so strong that I do not even think about where it originated from. Sometimes it is these emotions that take centre-stage, as I can also feel the reactions in my body. Perhaps I may feel heated because of anger, or even sweaty palms because of anxiousness.
It is times like this when I need to remember to tell myself to take a step back and breathe. How we feel can be triggered by what we think. When it comes down to it, what is it that I am thinking about specifically in those moments? Is my thought useful? Is it of the past, which cannot be changed? Are the thoughts accurate or biased? Am I seeing the negatives only, instead of the whole picture? These are the kind of questions that can challenge my thoughts. For me to be more in control of the thoughts, and not let them overpower me. That I remind myself I am bigger than my thoughts, and that they do not define me.
For this, having awareness is key. Being mindful of what is going on internally, and to be able to challenge it. Being present with the now, and not being stuck in the past or the future. What matters is the now – how to overcome and cope with the past experiences, and how to change things now for the future that I desire.
This process takes time, and it is always a learning curve. Much like how our physical strength needs training, so does our mental strength. There will be good days and bad days, and it can be easy to feel let down on the bad days. This happens to everyone, and we are not alone.
I still have a busy mind, but I keep going and remind myself that I am not my thoughts.
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